With this Key, I understood the cause of my own nerves and the simple action that I could take to get rid of them – for me this understanding was the beginning of a life changing journey to inner peace. This is truly a gift that horses bring us.
Even if you are not a nervous rider, this Lesson is the beginning of the emotional “Feel” with your horse that we talked about in the introduction and the beginning of being able to sense when something is going wrong with your horse before it is even noticeable in their body language – the beginning of awesome timing that enables even novice horse people to get good results.
This “feel” is what made it possible for Val to get such great results as a novice horse person.
If you have any trouble with the audio above, click here to listen to The Third Key to Happiness with Your Horse (There’s a written version of the audio below.)
Nervous Riders’ Seminar
If nerves for you are a big deal, then you can hear how to turn every cause of nerves into pure gold, in this short seminar about the causes and misconceptions about nerves and how to fix them.
Written Version of the Audio
Feeling nervous around our horse creates tension in our bodies that gets in the road of being a brilliant rider. Any level of fear is SUCH a blockage to good riding and just about the crappiest thing that can be happening.
Well, from today – from right now in fact – that’s gonna change.
Nervousness and anxiety – dread even – all the levels of fear are just an alarm bell – a message – and it is just telling you that you need to make yourself safe. You are not only entitled to BE safe – you are entitled to FEEL safe. You are entitled to it!
And when you make yourself safe – when you understand what it is that you need to know or do to make yourself safe – pffft the fear just disappears and so does the body tension that goes with it.
If I am afraid of something I figure out what it is that I need to know or do, so the fear is no longer there.
Sometimes that is working the Comfort Zone Model in The Second Key for MYSELF and sometimes…
And sometimes it is working the Comfort Zone Model for my HORSE.
I was looking for a drum roll to put in here, because this next bit is the most important thing you are going to ever hear about your horse.
Did you notice that I said sometimes when I feel anxious, I work the Comfort Zone Model for MY HORSE?
That’s because, in this normal, everyday connection that we feel with our horse – we ALL at times, experience our horse’s fear so intensely that we think it is ours.
It happens to ALL of us.
I have proved this over thousands of horses and riders now.
I guarantee you, I absolutely guarantee you that if you have been feeling anxiety and tension around your horse then at least some of that fear you have been experiencing will be your horse’s fear.
And this is not something that happens to only specially sensitive people – it is a normal every day part of our connectedness to our horse. In fact, the more connected you have been to your horse, the more likely you have been to be feeling their fear. This is why some very good riders lose their nerve. And it’s how they can get it back quite quickly.
I have worked with what must be thousands of people now and they all experience the same thing. And when we use this connectedness to help our horse feel safe, when we take action to help our horse feel safe, then ppfft! our fear just disappears.
So here’s what you can do. No matter whether the fear you are feeling is yours or your horse’s, do whatever it takes to find a Comfort Zone. We talked about the Comfort Zone in the the last lesson, The Second Key to Happiness With Your Horse.
You can change something so that you are safe, you can stop doing what you are doing, you can back off, you can break it down into baby steps for your horse, you can slow it down, explain it better, you can do it differently – whatever. You take some kind of action to make you and your horse be and feel safe.
If you are looking to be a good rider and to be good with horses, then your mission should you choose to accept it, is to listen to every level of your fear and your horse’s fear from slight anxiety to the big dread feelings and use those feelings to make both of you be and feel safe – every time that you feel the fear – theirs or yours!
I am so excited for you, because you have no idea yet how big a deal this is going to be for you and your horse. And how much tension this will release from your body and from your horse’s body too and what a wonderful effect that will have on your riding together.
Tomorrow’s lesson looks as if it is about catching your horse – but that’s not all it’s about folks! It’s about learning how to use a feeling that I call Not Quite Right that is the foundation for world class feel for your horse and the foundation for brilliant riding too.
We use catching your horse to show you how YOU experience this Not Quite Right feeling and how you can use it to get really good results with your horse. And for those of you who do have trouble catching your horse – relax, those times are just about over.