You would be surprised I think to hear how many “problems” that people have that can be solved when they solve any Not Quite Rights around food – even when the issue has nothing whatever to do with food.
Can you stay connected with your horse around food, or does food DISCONNECT you?
If you can stay connected around a time of high instinctive energy like food, then EVERYTHING you do with your horse will be easier and more connected.
Hmmm… it appears that our horse’s attitudes around food might have something to do with leadership… Oh really…?
This is a BIIIGGG topic folks! So we’ve got some more lessons coming up to gently and without force increase your connection around food.
That makes this a very important lesson for those of you who have big dreams with your horse. It’s also an important lesson for those of you who are looking for a deep sense of safety and peacefulness around your horse.
The original version of the My Grass Game was about getting creative around “what’s in it for the horse to do what you want them to do” – click here to watch the foundation lesson about creative motivation again.
The advanced version of the My Grass Game in this Lesson assumes that you have played the basic version of the game – because this is not about dominance, it’s about motivating your horse differently and that difference is a fine line. The good news is that following your feel good feelings and using your Not Quite Right to know when to back off and change something, will help you to ride that fine line.
Because I know some of you stable or yard your horses or keep them on very short grass, you need to make sure that your horse isn’t actually hungry before you play this game.
It is critical that this Lesson be ONLY done when you have established a feeling of safety between the two of you. Elimination of fear takes priority over leadership. But if you’re listening to your horse by following the good feelings and using the Not Quite Rights to back off and change something, you’ll already notice that. 🙂
There’s also a brilliant game called the 24 carrot toss game on the forum in Extra lessons from Jenny that I’ve suggested for folks who have a horse easily disconnected by food.
In addition to the leadership issues that can be worked on when you and your horse are in the right stage of your relationship, this food issue can come up at all kinds of inconvenient moments – when you’re having your horse’s feet trimmed and someone walks past to feed their horse and your horse is saying “where’s mine?” – when you’re out riding and the reins get dragged out of your hand so they can eat or any time that your horse is standing on grass and their head is up and down like a yo yo as they pull their head down and you lift it up – up down, up down.
This advanced My Grass Game plays the game at liberty and combines it with other techniques. So if you decide to turn play this Game at liberty, please take the halter off. In my line of work I have seen the results of too many accidents where horses have got their foot stuck in their halter while scratching themselves or caught the halter on a post or similar.
Important Note:
This game is for those who still have some Not Quite Rights about feed time or grass eating. If you do not have any Not Quite Rights, then maybe you will never even need this game. For me, I have found that leadership around food has come in layers, with me getting better and better at it over time. So this game is for those who still have any Not Quite Rights, frustrations or safety issues to get to the bottom of around food or grass.
Click here for an alternate audio
Feeding out had been the source of much angst for 11 years until Holly, pictured above, got a handle on it doing the Fast Track program. Click here for the video of what feeding out is like after solving these problems.
And if this is your big issue and you want to know more about how she achieved this, click here to read Holly’s blog about it.
Written Version of the Audio
When it comes to feeding time or about the My Grass game, have you got any Not Quite Right left – at all?
It is perfectly OK that we all have different boundaries – what’s right for you may not be OK for me and vice versa – that’s’ the whole idea of teaching you to listen to your Not Quite Right’s early. But if you have the tiniest little Not Quite Right either at feed time or about getting pulled around while your horse snatches at grass, then that is not quite right.
I came up with this topic for a lesson because I was trimming Bobby’s feet when I realised that there was still a tiny Not Quite Right about his focus on me when there was food around.
Tsk, tsk you would think I knew better, hey? Well, you know, Bobby is so special and I love him so much that it’s harder to be strict with him than with the others, even when I have a feeling that something is Not Quite Right. Anybody else recognise that situation?
I notice that tiny Blondie gets away with more than the others too.
And that’s OK – unless it starts getting in the way of a good relationship. And it was certainly getting in the road of a good relationship during that feet trimming time!
When I stopped and had a look at what was happening, I realised that feet trimming time was not the perfect time to be addressing the grass issue either – THAT timing risked having resentment or some kind of negative energy attached to feet trimming.
So I either had to stop feet trimming altogether and focus on the food issue or get the darned job done and attend to the food later – but not both at the same time.
In this case I finished trimming and then later I took his halter off and played the My Grass Game at liberty.
Then when he put his head down to eat the grass, I said “My Grass” and moved him on fairly vigorously and then dropped my energy and mirrored him.
The success in this is all in our attitude. This is not remotely about punishment for him wanting the grass or eating the grass. This is not HIS problem, it’s MY problem. It’s MY Not Quite Right, it’s MY problem.
When he went to eat grass again – I moved him off vigorously with “My Grass” again. And mirrored him again.
If I personally had any kind of attitude while I was doing this, any kind of anger, any kind of frustration – then I would have stopped, sat for a bit, breathed for a Quiet Mind and allowed the answer to come floating up to my conscious mind.
I drove him off the grass and mirrored him a few more times until the energy changed and I decided to allow him to eat again.
Then I paid more attention at feed time and yes, he was being just a bit pushy at feed time too. What a surprise!
Because Bobby is such a gentle horse, it was easy to let him get away with that – but there was my small Not Quite Right and it was not OK!
So I sent him off firmly and repeated that whenever he came back until he relaxed and stayed away.
THEN I walked over and gave him his feed. It was interesting to note that he looked happier and moved nicely and rhythmically as he trotted around the paddock.
Leadership comes from changing the horses speed and direction with the right attitude.
But one of the biggest attributes of a leader is the well being of the herd. And a significant part of the well being of the herd is about peacefulness. And peacefulness comes – not from ignoring our Not Quite Rights – but from understanding what they are about and acting on them.
We will be guided as to the best action for OUR relationship with our horse when we are guided by our Not Quite Rights.
This looking at the small Not Quite Rights about food is about the balance of yin and yang.
As you go to great lengths to help your horse become not afraid of things and bend over backwards to listen to their needs and wants even – this is the balance where you will solve many problems that seem unrelated but are related to leadership.
Enjoy checking for any Not Quite Rights around grass or food and enjoy the results of fixing those!
Up Next
In your next Lesson, we’ll look at teaching your horse to keep gentle attention on you whenever you are around them – it’s a critical part of being safe with your horse and being able to help your horse feel safe and also has huge implications for your ridden work.