Lisa was describing in Questions for Jenny today, how she was going sooo… well with the connection work in The 9 Keys for Happiness with Your Horse. Then his sense of play came up, he bit her – she slapped him for biting and the lights went out…
Biting is so common, here’s my reply with a whole bunch of different options to handle it.
Darn it, you stuffed it up! Can you feel me smiling while you are reading this? So now you have an opportunity for a deeper understanding of each other and a deeper bond as a result as you fix that. There are a whole bunch of different ways that you can handle that differently for next time:
1. Stay in connection so that you feel the playful energy coming up BEFORE he bites you and then get him to go further away from you and express that playfulness in some other way.
2. Have a quiet mind session with him and explain that you don’t like biting and mentally show him how you would like him to express his playfulness with you instead. (that quiet mind lesson is a later bonus in your freebies The 9 Keys to Happiness with Your Horse series.)
3. Have a quiet mind session with him with the intention of understanding how HE would like you to deal with that problem – see if HE has any insights to add to the equation. Your connection with him was so deep straight away from The First Key to Happiness with Your Horse, that this could be a promising option.
4. You can express your displeasure by sending him away (in the way of the lead mare).
5. Or by leaving yourself. I know someone who completely turned around a very aggressive horse just by leaving every time he was aggressive, instead of meeting his aggression and escalating it. In your case he was clearly being playful, not aggressive, but it could work there too – you could just refuse to play.
6. I prefer to listen to my horses and my own insights these days, but Pat Parelli has a good contribution to this one. He always says “I find rubbing the bit spot helps” if the question is about AFTER you have been bitten and he advocates allowing them to meet your elbow AS they are coming towards you to bite. I have seen few horses take offence at that but your timing has to be excellent – and the timing is not excellent if your elbow happens AFTER they have bitten.
7. I personally prefer the gentler ways first, but I am not above using the elbow if no other way is working! It’s much better than getting angry about it.
I am going to post this up on the blog too, where more people will see it – thanks for great questions!
Grab the 9 Keys to Happiness with Your Horse at the top of our Training Page below – KNOWING that they are only the first step to solving a long standing biting problem. If all you want to do is solve a biting problem and keep on working with your horse in the same way, then you’re not going to be happy with the way we do things around here. but if you’re prepared for an entirely different relationship – one of mutual respect and happiness beyond what you thought possible with a horse, then stick around!
My 16yr old Appy has always been a bit of a biter. Rugging/saddling/ putting halter on him/grooming. A few weeks ago he got a full mouth full of my arm, it bruised straight away and bruised down my forearm over the next week. Now the bruise has gone but a small lump is left – so it was most definatley a decent bite!
We took him to a breaker not so long ago (before this incident) for a manners check up etc. While at the breakers he didnt really put a foot wrong, here and there but not much and the breaker wasnt really concerned with his behaviour. So I put a lot of his behaviour, which is moslty directed at me…most often than not down to my low confidence with him and not being his alpha.
I’m wondering what i can do to build my confidence on the ground with him? I am very aware of my breathing and how I generally hold myself when I’m around him, I’m slowly getting there hopefully! But would love some tips/pointers as to what else i can do to help me with my confidence and Coby (appy) acknowledge my leadership role!
Any help/guidance would be muchly appreciated – thank you 🙂
Good news Narelle – you don’t have to be the leader to get beautiful co-operation from your horse and stop things like this biting. I see that you got the freebie lessons The Six Keys to Happiness with Your Horse, so that is a very good start. For other people reading this, that’s the big yellow box on the right hand side, top of of every page on this website.
If he is using biting as a desperate attempt to tell you something, then the First Key will help you figure out what that is. Spend a fair bit of time in that quiet mind space with that key and come back to me to chat about what comes up.
If it’s a habit that he has developed, an automatic, neural pathway response, then we can change that too, specially with an understanding of the Comfort Zone, Not Too Sure Zone and the Oh Shit Zone that we talk about in The Second Key to Happiness with Your Horse. Often biting horses have only been punished for biting in their oh shit zone and haven’t learned anything at all about stopping – so they bite again the next time they are in the same situation. The key is to explain that biting is unacceptable in The Not Too Sure Zone where they can still think.
There may be old resistances to being groomed, haltered, rugged where he has been forced about these things way back in the beginning and developed a severe dislike of. We can change that using the Fourth Key to Happiness with Your Horse – which is about using that early warning signal that I call Not Quite Right, to stop what you are doing, back off and wait for The Chew and give him the opportunity to release that old resistance or sometimes even trauma. If it is a resistance to the halter, rug or grooming, then using an approach and retreat process in that way WILL fix it.
There are some physical reasons that a horse could be uncomfortable enough to bite in their desire to tell you that they do not want to be touched – like copper deficiency or magnesium deficiency. Copper deficiency will have those pretty dark markings around the eyes and nose as a sign and magnesium deficiency will be worse in spring and autumn in most parts of Australia.
The biggest deal of all to me though Narelle, is that clearly neither you nor he is enjoying things together as much as you could be and you both DESERVE to be enjoying life together much more than this. So when you’ve got those Six Keys and had a think about how they apply to your problem, then come back to me and have a chat about how you are going and your way forwards from there.
Hi Jenny
I have a 21year thoroughbred who I am not riding at the moment. He is turned out with 3 mares and assumes the position of lead male (he is gelded).
I have started on a program of giving him more choice at liberty and rewarding with positive reinforcement.
I had to halter him for the trimmer and when he finished I lead him on the road for a change of scene and to assess him to see how he was moving. He didn’t really want to go so we didn’t go far. I turned around to go home and his ears went flat back and he lunged at me biting me on my chest. It felt like a bullet. I was so shocked I’ve had him for 12 years and he has never done this. I am now very wary of him especially working at liberty and I haven’t led him since. Any insights would be welcome
I can understand why you are shocked Anne – it is unnacceptable when you are listening to them to have a horse attack you like that. I would be very wary of working with him too. And I would sure as heck want to solve it before I had to have anything close to do with him! So let’s get to the bottom of it. I would like you to start with Lesson 35 – the quiet mind for deeper problem solving. I expect that lesson to bring to your mind the insights that you need to move forward confidently. When you have done that, I would like you to come back to me and touch base for a quick phone call. Because I don’t like the sound of his behaviour at all, I would like to check in with you.:)
This is excellent info and soooo works…. my big boy Ali has always (& still is) quite mouthy and likes to play but by being the “lead mare” and talking to him and leaving the scene he has calmed down the biting and is a pleasure to “work & play” with. Thanks Jenny!
You’re welcome Nan. Biting can be such an aggravation, even dangerous – and how we deal with these things has a HUGE influence on our bond with our horse. Well done you!